We have prison filled with people who haven’t told their stories

Avec : Robert Enright

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We have prisons that are filled
with people who have stories

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to tell us, and they're never
given a chance to tell those

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stories for the most part and
here's what I mean.

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We do forgiveness therapy in
prisons and the very first time

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we did a forgiveness therapy
group in a maximum security

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prison with men who were
all mass murderers.

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The therapists, I was a
consultant not the therapist.

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The therapist asked the men,

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"Tell us your story of
those who have hurt you."

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And one of the men who had shot
every member of his family dead

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started weeping.

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Here's this big strong guy who
had been in prison

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for 20 years, and
he was weeping and

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the therapist said,
"Why are you crying?".

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And he said nobody
ever asked me that before.

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And they said,
"Tell us your story".

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Here's the story.

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When he was a child for
punishment his father made him

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crawl on his hands and knees on
a gravel road down

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to get the mail out of the mailbox
and then crawl back again to

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the house and when he came back
he was cut bruised and humiliated.

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And that happened over
and over again.

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At 16 years of age when he was
old enough to pick up

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his father's hunting rifle he shot
the entire family

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and nobody had ever asked him
about that story in prison because

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everyone was intent on
stopping his behavior,

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his murderous behavior
and including

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some of his dangerous
behavior while in prison.

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And I find that actually
typical, where there is a hope

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of rehabilitation of the
behavior,

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but his behavior was an
accumulation of injustice,

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followed by emotional pain,
followed by anger,

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then unhealthy anger, then rage
that came out in this way.

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And here's what I ask myself
all the time and I really ask

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those who will listen.

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What would have happened in
that family if the father

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could have forgiven those in his past
where he wasn't so angry

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as to have a brutal kind
of exercise for his son.

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He thought it was discipline
but it was a demeaning thing.

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What would have happened if
that son as he was growing up

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knew about forgiveness and
began forgiving his father.

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Do you know what I
think would happen to this day?

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He would not be in prison

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and every one of his
family members would be alive.

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But forgiveness was not as we
say on the radar.

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No one thought about it and
it ended tragically,

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with the whole family deceased

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and him in maximum security
prison for life.